plane takes off in wienna. I'm partly going to my country of origin.
I've been to all former soviet repuplics exept Georgia. but I have
never been to Russia. Maybe my ambivalence towards Russia has to do
with that my fathers jewish family fled the country right after the
Molotov-R. pact. I always knew I would love the people. Once you get
close you become like family and together you stand aginst the rest of
the world. For a long time I Found this caring suffacating, beacause
this come with the unspoken accord that 'if I do this for you, I'll
expect it from you, when ever'. And you get to help that persons whole
family too. This is an infringement upon my independence. I had to
learn the hard way how to be close and at the same pull away to be
able to hear my intuition. To keep the balance between being part of
and not getting too entangled.
Marie
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